To whom it may concern:
I don’t know if it’s the spring equinox or what, but this seems to have been kind of a crazy week in libraryland for “interesting” interactions between librarians and patrons. According to my twitter feed, librarians have been hard at work of late documenting some of their kookiest patron stories. I think it’s time for us to come together and highlight these anecdotes that fill behind-the-scenes library life with glorious OMGs, WTFs, and LOLs. In other words, it’s time for….
Sh!t People Say to Librarians!
In the style of that youtube meme, we really need one for this. So, librarianish internet. This is my proposal. I will suggest a few lines. We can all pitch in and make this video a reality.
“Where’s the bathroom?”
“Can I borrow your stapler?”
“When did you start closing early on Fridays?”
“Do you have more staples?”
“I printed something and it won’t come out.”
“I saw this segment on 60 Minutes… maybe a month ago? It was about kids in a ballroom dancing class? Could you find the video of that? Oh, and the name of the school. Also, I was wondering, it seemed weird that all of the children in the class were Asian. Were they in an Asian neighborhood or something? There was this one kid that was interviewed on the show. Could you tell me his birthdate and the place he was born?”
“Is that non-fiction or real life?”
“I love your glasses. Where did you get them? You should be a glasses model.”
“Where’s your bathroom?”
“Can I eat this in here?”
“Is there a bathroom on this floor?”
“Can you watch my kid?”
“Do you have a pen? No, a blue one.”
“Are you sure you’re old enough to be a librarian?”
“Hasn’t google pretty much ruined all y’alls jobs!?”
Thanks for your consideration. Please feel free to suggest your own representative quotes, real or invented. It’s time for us to stand up, shout out, and make a real contribution to this overblown (and already sooo 2 months ago) youtube trend. After all, somebody needs to reply to that one Sh!t Librarians Say video that’s pretty much just 49 seconds of shushing.
[Special thanks to @the_weeds and @laneie for their contributions.]